Ryder comes out in his half-pant get-up, sunglasses, and headband. Funky attire and all, I still like this guy.
Side note, I miss Curt Hawkins too.
Very early in the match Ryder tosses his headband into Benjamin’s face. Benjamin gains control really quickly and works Ryder into the corner. Clothesline by Benjamin, followed by a missed Stinger Splash at the opposite corner. Ryder is able to hit a neckbreaker on the dazed Benjamin. Ryder is now in control of the match and utilizes some submission maneuvers.
Benjamin turns things around after throwing some punches and elbows into Ryder’s gut. Springboard Blockbuster by Benjamin, followed up by Paydirt, equals a 1-2-3 for the Gold Standard.
Post match, the “Franchise Player” stands on the middle ropes, posing to the audience, thus making the face turn even more evident.
Winner: Shelton Benjamin by pinfall, using Paydirt (Time: less than 4 mins)
We recap last week’s match between Goldust and Sheamus where both men were counted out. We learn tonight’s main event is Goldust versus Sheamus in a No Countout, No Disqualification match. Did they really need to say No Countout since there is no DQ?
Match #1: Shelton Benjamin v. Zack Ryder
Benjamin is coming out first and is referred to as the “Franchise Player” by Matt Striker. Seeing as how Benjamin hasn’t even sniffed an ECW Title shot, I think that claim is a bit of a stretch.
The Abraham Washington Show Segment
Hall of Famer Tony Atlas returns to ECW as the announcer for the critically panned, I mean “acclaimed,” The Abraham Washington Show. Washington does his shtick of insulting the city they are in and Atlas guffaws more annoyingly than Michael Cole on commentary.
Tonight’s guest on the show is Gregory Helms. Side note: Glad to see Helms is sober, unlike his weekend drinking buddy, Christopher Daniels. Helms denies that he is the Hurricane.
Washington introduces his other guests are Paul and Katie Lea Burchill. Might I add that I
Vladimir Kozlov and Ezekiel w/William Regal v. Jim Parks and Mike Tolar
If you don’t smell squash then you might have a deviated septum. Kozlov starts things off and he is manhandling Tolar. A quick tag to Zeke who continues the assault. Park gets his head rammed into the outside part of the turnbuckle and bounces off around 10 things before hitting the ground. Both Zeke and Kozlov hit their variations of the Uranage before Kozlov gets the pin.
Winner: Kozlov and Ezekiel by pinfall, Uranage variation (Time: Just over 2 mins)
After the match, Regal applies the Regal Stretch submission move on the poor fellow. This brings out the ECW Champion, Christian, who has a mic in hand. Regal challenges him to come to the ring and Christian explains that he won’t be coming alone. Tommy Dreamer joins Christian atop the ramp. Dreamer then goes all samurai by pulling out two Singapore Canes from behind his back. He and Christian proceed to cane Zeke and Kozlov, with Regal narrowly escaping Christian.
Before heading to break, a similar WrestleMania video airs where wrestlers talk about Shawn Michaels greatness.
WrestleMania 25 package showing ‘Taker/HBK
It might be me but it looks like Tiffany, the ECW General Manager, has a retainer or is using Invisalign. She sets up the WrestleMania package and we see the five minutes of the best wrestling match I have ever seen in the WWE. Yes, Sim Snuka, you totally missed your spot there by letting ‘Taker drop on his head. We wish you the best in all your future endeavors.
Main Event: Goldust versus Sheamus
Sheamus needs some better music. It’s not ruthless enough for the Gaellic warrior.
Tie-up to start the match. Back and forth before Goldust hits a dropkick on Sheamus. Sheamus rolls out of the ring and Goldust follows him where he drops him with a commercial. Seems like a perfect time for a commercial.
Back from commercial, Goldust clotheslines Sheamus over the top rope with such force, both men go over. On the outside, Sheamus was able to launch Goldust, back first, into the ring post. A bodyslam and a few knee drops by Sheamus to Goldust, still outside the ring.
Back in the ring, Sheamus goes for a pin to no avail. Goldust works in some offense before having his trademark drop-on-back-to-slap-opponent-in-face move is countered by Sheamus. Sheamus proceeds to work Goldust over with some submissions.
Goldust is able to get some shots in before catching a boot to the gut. Small package by Goldust only gets a two count. Back on the outside, Sheamus and his shoulder meet the ring post.
Back on the inside, Goldust is punching Sheamus in the corner. The oldest Rhodes son goes for a bulldog but it’s countered by Sheamus. Goldust is able to get his trademark slap in (see two paragraphs up) but it hardly phases Sheamus. A pump kick followed by the Irish Curse and Sheamus is victorious.
Winner: Sheamus by pinfall, Irish Curse (Time: Around 13 mins.)
Thoughts on Show: A Shelton Benjamin match needs to be more than three minutes long. Did we really need to see another squash match involving Kozlov and Ezekiel? The main event was rather boring, despite me liking the feud between the two men. Not sure why the WrestleMania package was there, but it’s sad when that was the best thing on the show. Overall, it was a weak edition of ECW.
ove these “siblings” and Paul on the microphone impresses me. The angry Brit continues to claim that Helms and Hurricane are one in the same until a video pops up via the Hurri-Cam.
Hurricane explains that he would have been in Cleveland but he’s busy in Gotham. Nevertheless, he challenges Burchill to a match next week on ECW.
Before going to commercial, we see a vignette of The Undertaker’s dominance at WrestleMania and several wrestlers offer their take on the illustrious streak.
